7 Ways to Be Intentional as a Single Adult

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We’re continuing our series on ways to be intentional in different walks of life! In the last episode, we talked about how to be intentional as a Christian college student. This week, we’re talking about how to be intentional as a single adult! We’re talking specifically to anyone 22 years and older, in the workforce, not married, and no children.

Let’s jump in!

1. Pursue faithfulness where you are.

Young adults can often get caught up in what they are going to do a year, five years, or ten years from now. We imagine the dream job we will have, the dream family we will have, and all of the accomplishments we will obtain.

You can get so caught up in what the future holds that you neglect faithfulness in your current life.

Focus on pursuing faithfulness in your current job, your current relationships, your current church, etc… If you are a waiter, be the best dang waiter you can be. If you only have a few friends, be the best dang friend you can be. Or, if your church thinks that all you are good for is stacking chairs, be the best dang chair stacker they’ve ever seen, and do it with a smile on your face. Be the best sibling, child, coworker, etc… you can be.

2. If you want to get married one day, focus on becoming the person you would want to marry rather than the attributes of the person you are looking to marry.

Having an “ideal” husband or wife is not bad, but it shouldn’t be the focus. This is kind of like taking the log out of your eye first. So often, we can dream of that “perfect person” while forgetting that we ourselves are not perfect. It is ok to have things that you are looking for in a spouse, but first focus on yourself. You are responsible for you.

If you feel called to singleness, willingly or unwillingly, ask how you can use that calling to serve others. Paul talks about how he wishes more people would remain single in order to serve the church more.

3. You most likely have the most free time you will ever have in your life, use it wisely.

As a single adult, you likely aren’t responsible for others. You will never have as much free time as you do now.

It can be very easy to slide into bad habits (binging Netflix, staying up super late, neglecting physical health, etc…). In fact, whenever I am away from the fam I (Nathaniel) fall into these bad habits.

Don’t waste your free time! Focus on how you can utilize that free time to serve others. 

4. Establish the habits you want to continue for the rest of your lives

This builds off of the last point. If you use your time to build good habits, they will last for the rest of your life.

Get in the word. Even if you have to wake up early, wake up even earlier to make the time to spend time with God. Eat well. Focus on your spiritual, physical, and mental health!

5. Evaluate who you want to be like and spend lots of time with them

Who do you want to be like as a Christian, husband/wife, or parent? Spend time with them! Find these people at church, work, etc… Be around them and “force” yourselves into their lives. Have them over for dinner and get to know them! Ask to come over to their house and hang out with them. If they are solid believers, we can’t imagine them actually saying no.

6. Be sold out to your local church

Get plugged into a local church.

Be invested in a small group (and not just a young singles small group). Have a diverse, intergenerational community. There are so many benefits that come from that.  

Serve your church (knowing that you have more time than you’ll most likely ever have until you’re retired). Greet, serve in childcare, run slides, etc… Even if it’s simple, do it! Be the first to do the hard job.

Disciple people and be discipled by others.

7. View your workplace as your ministry and invest in your co-workers

Most of us in a Western context have a very compartmentalized view of life. I have my work, hobbies, friends, church, etc… and they are all separate compartments of my life. But in single adulthood, you spend the majority of your time at work, so you should intentionally invest your time well.

God has you in your job right now for a reason, regardless of your circumstances. He doesn’t have you there to just grit your teeth and get through it. It’s so that you can invest in your coworkers and be changed by the work you are doing and do the best possible work you can do. You could potentially be the only believer in your workplace. Use that opportunity well! Be drastically different than the way the world interacts with the workplace. Oftentimes, living life in a godly way can lead to interest and even questions and gospel conversations with your coworkers.

Remember Luke 14:12-14. “He (Jesus) said also to the man who had invited him, ‘When you give a dinner or a banquet, do not invite your friends, your brothers, your relatives or rich neighbors, lest they also invite you in return and you be repaid. But when you give a feast, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you. For you will be repaid at the resurrection of the just.'”

Oftentimes, as Christians, we can insulate ourselves and only surround ourselves with just believers. You should be gathering with non-believers and inviting them into your homes. Take advantage of singleness and invest in the non-believers in your workplace.

One Degree Shift

You may notice that a lot of our points had this underlying idea of utilizing your time wisely. While this is important for everyone to do, it is especially so for single young adults. If you have a conventional job, you have way more free time than you realize. Spend it wisely.

Pick one of these principles to implement in your own life.

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